A parody article portraying how crazy some opinion articles seem. You can sell anything, but when you start just lying right out of your teeth, that’s when thinks turn sarcastic.
5 reasons to start drinking coffee…like right now
- You will be happy-Look at those people. They look happy. You are not until a cup of coffee hits your hands. Look at those people. They have friends. If you drink coffee, you will have friends. It’s easy as that.
- They tell me I’ve had too much-That is another reason to drink another cup. You need to move off that couch you are reading this article at, don’t you? It’s easy as that, drink some coffee. You can never have too much.
- You need to make money-You need to work, and to work you need to stay awake, and to stay awake you need to drink coffee. So, the logical explanation is to drink coffee.
- Your kids will love you more-If you drink coffee, especially those expensive bean brand coffee brands, you will be so energized you will be able to do all the things your kids as you. You want your family to love you, don’t you? Why haven’t you started drinking coffee yet?
- You will exercise better-Who dosen’t love a good sprint on the treadmill while jacked up on coffee? It may make you bloated and hungry, but at least you will get a good sweat in there!
As I said before…if you haven’t started drinking coffee yet…now might be the time…