Pregnancy Rant

Cult Labs on Twitter: "DON'T feed Gizmo after midnight! Stay up ...

So I’m pregnant. In movies, they show pregnant women like angels in fields of clouds. But, that’s not it at all. It’s more like scenes from Lord of the Rings where gollum comes out and says i’m the father and you’re birthing an alien! Have you ever seen the real life images not the ultrasound but what a real baby looks like? They’re not cute! It’s more like a tiny gremlin. Don’t feed it after midnight, that’s actually good advice, ever wonder why you’re puking? The gremlins! Invasion of The Body Snatchers! But what they left out is the body snatchers are the babies! Falling from the sky.

If you’ve ever had a girlfriend, just think of a baby as 10x more clingy and always wants the tits. I mean, can’t blame them, they are good. But, Jesus, trying to rip them off my skin! Can you put a baby in prison…When it’s unborn? Case of Mother Vs. Unborn…He’s depriving me of my food…It’s emotional abuse! And I might just vomit right here. That’s a crime folks.

Also, everyone keeps saying oh it’ll just get better, don’t worry be strong. I am WEAK! If anything it just keeps getting worse! So no body tell me to be strong just complain with me and remind me how much pregnancy sucks.

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